Welcome back, football fans, to our quasi-professional football picks! Each week we will pick game winners based on Vegas over/under lines, and add some sharp commentary to the games. The readers are giving our analysts a run for their money, proving that we should probably give away this job as well as some fan gear. Let’s see how they hold up!
In lieu of the anger toward the latest Facebook update, we decided to let the Yo Dawg meme have a crack at it.
You want to complain about the new Facebook, and how you got so used to the latest phase of Facebook after they changed for the 4th or 5th time that it’s ridiculous that they would change it again? Well, R. Lee Ermey has some choice words for you.
Moonbeam Crenshaw returns to tell you your future, for better or for worse.
A lot of upsets had our pseudo-professional analysts reeling. The Bills won; the Raiders won; the Dolphins score some points! And Eli Manning threw an interception. Well, it can’t all be surprising. Let’s see what happens this week!
This is what happens when you give every kid in the soccer league a trophy. This is what happens when you hold up movie and television stars as idols. They start making shitty music. I want to blame Gwyneth Paltrow for this trend, but its dark roots go much deeper. Remember Don Johnson? Remember Eddie Murphy? We have a long and shameful history of first convincing people that they can act, and then allowing them to believe they can sing.
East Rutherford, NJ: The NFL season has begun, and so has Rex Ryan’s Wild Jet-Ride as the New York Jets, aka Cardiac Kids, defeated the Dallas Cowboys 27-24 at home in a way that left half the fans in attendance hospitalized due to cardiac arrest.
Word has come down from the NFL brass about the state of one of the league’s best quarterbacks, and it is a fact that will make some fans cringe, and others (everyone but Colts fans) rejoice: Peyton Manning will most likely miss all of the 2011 season. Non-Colts fans, particularly those with teams in the AFC South, may already be celebrating wins on their game schedule, but the celebration is not without terror for the National Football League and its fans, for with the fall of Peyton Manning comes a domino effect of activity that may destroy the world as we know it.
Welcome back, football fans, to our quasi-professional football picks! Each week we will pick game winners based on Vegas over/under lines, and add some sharp commentary to the games. This year, readers can get in on the action for a change to win prizes, trophies, and the chance to show up so-called sports analysts once and for all! Just email firstname.lastname@example.org with “Powder Puff Picks” in the header, your alias name, and your picks for the week. Registration ends Thursday, September 8th at 6pm EST. Last year’s Powder Puff King was Steve Elle. Let’s see if he can defend his crown!
New York, NY: Fear, destruction, and death have taken over the boroughs of Manhattan once again. Some would blame it on climate change. Others, President Obama, or underground mole people igniting bombs underground.Upon researching of The Shadow Government, it was learned that the name was held by a community of thrill-seekers that have made the streets of many major metropolitan areas, including New York City, Vancouver, and London, their personal playground with a 3 week game of deception, covert operations, and squirt-gun assassinations: Street Wars.