Eminem Denies Salad Tossing on MTV
The 2009 MTV Movie Awards ceremony was a topic of drama and controversy once again, besides the uproar from the crowd about Jason Segal not winning the "WTF Moment" Award…
Cheney Defends Waterboarding, Insanity
Washington, DC: Former Vice President Dick “Shotgun” Cheney, an outspoken opponent of the Obama administration, has stepped forward and announced that waterboarding is an essential tool for fighting terrorism. He…
Paris Hilton Loses Phone…Again
Paris Hilton has reportedly lost her Blackberry during a recent trip to France to attend the Cannes International Film Festival. Industry insiders are amazed at her carelessness because this is…
Governor Schwarzenegger to Terminate Deficit
Sacramento, CA: This week marked a great upset against the noble and knowledgeable Governor of California, Arnold Schwarzenegger. Proposition 1A, an economic plan meant to strengthen a poor economy by…
Dr. FitzGerald Revived with Rube Goldberg Defibrillator
Dr. Jerri Nielsen FitzGerald, 57, whose struggle against breast cancer during a winter at the South Pole captivated the world, died, only to be revived moments later in what is…
Michael Vick to Join PETA
Leavenworth, KS: Former Atlanta Falcons quarterback Michael Vick has been released from the federal prison in Leavenworth, Kansas, and will finish the last two months of his 23 month sentence…
Study Shows Most Americans Have 40 Hour TV Week
In a study recently released by researchers at Yale University, it was revealed that nine out of every ten people in the United States are spending the equivalent of a…
Manchester Orchestra’s “Mean Everything To Nothing”
When you start up the first track on an album and you involuntarily say “What the hell?” it’s either a really good thing, or a really bad thing. There’s not…
American Apparel Settles Down Woody Allen
New York, NY: After a year of legal wrangling, Woody Allen and American Apparel have reached an agreement in the lawsuit filed by Allen last year, accusing American Apparel of…
World Confused What to Wish Pregnant Man
Bend, OR: The normally simple holiday of Mother's Day was turned on its head for well-wishers of a certain family. Visitors to the home of Thomas Beatie(aka that "pregnant man"…