BBC News

Chicago, IL: With temperatures dropping to freezing in southern Canada and north to northeast regions of the United States this week, the public is once again labeling the winter weather as a polar vortex, leading to the belief that the term has officially become overused for almost a month since the last debatable polar vortex took place.

“Ever since it got so cold that people in Chicago couldn’t leave their houses because their doors were frozen shut, the term ‘polar vortex’ has been thrown around as haphazardly as ‘jump the shark’ or ‘irony,'” explained weather analyst Chuck Merriwether. “I’ve heard people explain anything from shower water to Arizona Governor Jan Brewer as “fucking polar vortex.” It’s just way overdone.”

Merriwether was not exaggerating, unlike those claiming the coming weather to be another polar vortex. In a recent poll, the top terms linked to “polar vortex “are:

  1. Nipples
  2. Jan Brewer
  3. Temperature
  4. Rick James Songs

While most people seem unaware that the temperature normally drops during the months of December, January, and February, it is understandable how recent warm fronts that have passed through the north and northeast regions of the United States may confuse the general public, and lead to any temperature that forces one to wear a jacket as a result of a polar vortex.

Meanwhile, weather analysts are still shaking their heads due to the incorrect use of the perm “polar vortex” in early January. “I give up,” stated analyst Meredith Mahoney. “The next time I forecast the weather, I’m just going to quote Bill Murray in Groundhog Day and be done with it.”

By Patrick AE

Patrick is the man behind the man behind the site behind the man.... When he isn't writing for The Inept Owl, saving penguins from Hulk Hogan, and other activities that could be either truths or lies, he's editing everything else.