I have a soft, bloody spot in my heart for zombies. From the days of Lucio Fulci to when Romero was at his best to AMC’s The Walking Dead, zombie stories continue to excite me. Maybe I’m a sucker for the end of the world, or critical of the zombification of the world as we know it now, but I stand by my zombie love.

So here I am, writing not a review, but a journal log of my time on Dead Island, in order to annoy my editor with a plethora of posts that may just turn this website into a gaming review. This is Day 2. Enjoy.

Read Day 1 Here

Day 2: There’s a Shitload of Zombies Out There. Of course I’ll Go Find Your Teddy-Bear.

After finding a whole bunch of collectibles and seeing challenge progress text flash on the screen, I decided to finally check out the options in Dead Island. Apparently, this is a major co-op game. It makes sense. Zombies, energy drink healing cans(which is what I always drink when bleeding to death), and lootable cases and bags all regenerate after some time. I’m sure that’s great when playing with other people on the same map, so everyone get’s a chance to level up and score some loot, but it’s just annoying when playing by yourself. We’ll save the co-op for another time, if anyone is even there.

So off I go with a trusty crowbar(yeah, new weapons!), cracking more zombies in the face, and come across something: it’s not attacking me, I can’t seem to help it, but it’s there just the same: a zombie porn star.

Yes, surrounded by video cameras and industrial music blaring from the stereo, there was a female zombie tied to the bed in her skivvies. Whether it was a porn star that became infected during a shoot, or some psycho wanted to be a real deviant while the rest of the island was going to shit, I don’t know, but I didn’t kill her yet. Maybe I’ll find out, for better or for worse.

Eventually I find a pick-up truck. And yes, I can drive it, and mow down zombies in the process! Of course, like all zombie drivers, I’m a horrible driver with a lead foot, so I eventually get the truck stuck sideways between two palm trees and need to go off on foot to find some psychotic woman’s teddy bear. Luckily, I now have a sickle, so I can cut heads off with ease.

What really amazes me is the detail that went into this game in just the environment. for instance, the pools:

On one hand, you can find a pool good enough to swim in, or at least send as a postcard to make your ex-girlfriend jealous that she cheated on you before your trip to Hawaii. Just saying…

Then you have another pool across the street…

That’s the pool that you hope she had when she went off to Costa Rica with “some friends” before she dumped your sorry ass. I obviously like mine better, for jealous reasons.