World Overreacts about Ben Affleck as Batman
Ben Affleck is the next incarnation of Batman, leading to the crying, complaining, and threatened harakiri of Batman fans across the globe.
Mayan Pyramid Holds Bieber Carvings, New End of the World Prophecy
Holmul, GUATEMALA: Just when you thought the world was over the Mayan calendar, archaeologists went and helped dig it up again, like the recent discovery of Mayan carvings in a…
George Clooney Prepares to Play George Clooney in George Clooney
Hollywood, CA: In between producing, writing and directing films, his humanitarian work, political activism and slough of girlfriends, you would wonder when Academy Award winning actor George Clooney even has…
Rush Limbaugh to be Replaced by Rusho Limbaguez on Radio
Palm Beach, FL: Rush Limbaugh’s resistance to immigration reform may have been strengthened this past weekend, as it was learned that Rush, as well as Sean Hannity, would not have…
Beauty Pageants Changing Question Portion In Wake of Recent Gaffe
New York, NY: After the airing of the most recent Miss USA pageant, in which hopeful Miss Utah flubbed a question on equal pay for women in the workforce, pageant…
Americans Mistake Chechens for Alien Race in Defiance
Boston, MA: As the dust has settled and suspects are gathered up in relation to the bombing at the Boston Marathon, it seems that more questions than answers are rising.…
Ryan Gosling Role of Hollywood Hottie to be Filled by Joe Schmo
Tampa, FL: Last month, it was announced that Canadian actor Ryan Gosling would be taking a break from acting. Gosling held a press conference at the Beverly Hills Hotel to…
The Cynical Comedian’s View on Gay Marriage
While the Supreme Court justices decide how to vote to repeal Proposition 8 without looking too “gay”, and how to vote to keep Proposition 8 without looking too ridiculous, we…
Disney Versions of Star Wars and Other Lucas Films to Fear
When Disney first bought out Lucasfilm back in October, Star Wars fans cringed at the initial thought of the family-friendly animation juggernaut getting its hands on their reason for living.…
Jonathan Lipnicki Named Time Magazine’s Person of the Year
Decatur, IL: Jonathan Lipnicki, the diminutive star of Jerry Maguire and The Jeff Foxworthy Show has been named Time Magazine’s Person of the Year for 2013. Lipnicki, who at 22…