Batman Forever / Warner Bros.
Batman Forever / Warner Bros.

Providence, RI— It has been almost twenty-four hours since the accident at a Ringling Brothers and Barnum and Bailey Circus event left nine people injured including eight acrobats, and doctors are still unsure if they are in the midst of a really long circus act.

Batman Forever / Warner Bros.
Batman Forever / Warner Bros.

The act in question involved eight female acrobats who were in the midst of a “human chandelier,” where they are attached to a large metal apparatus by their hair and hung approximately thirty feet in the air. It is unknown if any of the injuries involve scalpings.

First responders on the scene were, at first, unsure if they had unwittingly interrupted the act due to the circus’ penchant for over-dramatization in order to excite their audiences.

“When I first saw the performers laying on the ground and not moving, I started looking around to see if the ringmaster was going to swoop his cape over them and make them disappear,” stated paramedic Arnie Hutchinson. “It never came. But it still can!”

Doctors at the emergency room were also unsure how to go forward with the explanation of the acrobats’ injuries. “I really struggled with the idea that these women were spinning around by their hair as they air-danced and held each other up, and that had nothing to do with their injuries,” explained. Dr. Anette Torpe. “I’m almost expecting someone to come in, yank the bedsheets away, and the acrobats be sitting up doing their ‘Ta-dah’ stance.”

Circus clowns were not present during the accident in order to soften the horror, although critics claim that surrounding a pile of critically injured acrobats by happy jokesters could have been poor taste.

By Patrick AE

Patrick is the man behind the man behind the site behind the man.... When he isn't writing for The Inept Owl, saving penguins from Hulk Hogan, and other activities that could be either truths or lies, he's editing everything else.