Americans Mistake Chechens for Alien Race in Defiance
Boston, MA: As the dust has settled and suspects are gathered up in relation to the bombing at the Boston Marathon, it seems that more questions than answers are rising.…
Breaking Dawn Part 2 Revised to Feature Maury Povich
Los Angeles, CA: In light of the recent scandal involving the screen couple turned Hollywood couple, Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart, fans and critics have been flooding the media with…
Sad Hipster to Give Death Cab for Cutie One More Shot
New York, NY: For years, Kyle Travers has been a self-proclaimed indie music afficionado. When he first heard Sonic Youth's "Bull In the Heather" at 14 years old. He was…
Salvation Army Says Yes to Guns, No to Sparkling Vampires
Few people are probably aware that the Salvation Army has strict guidelines when it comes to what types of toys it will give to needy children. For instance, as the…
Twilight Film Eclipse Claims First Victim
Wellington, New Zealand: With such horribly predictable plot lines and below-par acting, it was bound to happen eventually—Eclipse, the third film in the overrated Twilight saga, bored a movie-goer to…
Baby Names Prove People Should Not Reproduce
The Social Security Administration recently released its ever-popular “Most Popular Baby Names” list for 2009. And just what names were at the top of the top ten? Jacob and Isabella—two…
How Straight Men Can Watch New Moon Safely
Yes, you have heard right. Throughout the universe there live a small, but virile, population of heterosexual men who need to watch the Twilight Saga's latest besmirchment of the classic…