Mayan Pyramid Holds Bieber Carvings, New End of the World Prophecy
Holmul, GUATEMALA: Just when you thought the world was over the Mayan calendar, archaeologists went and helped dig it up again, like the recent discovery of Mayan carvings in a…
Rush Limbaugh to be Replaced by Rusho Limbaguez on Radio
Palm Beach, FL: Rush Limbaugh’s resistance to immigration reform may have been strengthened this past weekend, as it was learned that Rush, as well as Sean Hannity, would not have…
Royal Family Set to Visit Royal Baby
London, UK: In the aftermath of the birth of Prince “He Who Has No Name” to Prince William and Duchess Kate, the rest of the British Royal Family have begun…
Royal Baby to be Sacrificed for Immortality of Queen Elizabeth II
London, UK: For the past few weeks, the media was swarming with constant news updates, questions, and predictions on the status of the infant begot by Prince William and Duchess…
No, You Can’t Buy Detroit for a Dollar
Detroit, MI: Late last week, the city of Detroit filed for Chapter 9 bankruptcy protection in federal court. Yes, the entire city. Through decades of alleged funds mismanagement and job,…
Zimmerman Leaves Courthouse, Shoots 5 People Giving Him Stink Eye
Sanford, FL: The trial of George Zimmerman for the shooting death of 17 year old Trayvon Martin came to a close late Saturday night, as a jury of six women…
Republicans Unleash George W. Bush on Democrats
Washington DC: It took 4 years for Republicans to figure out how to get out from under the cloud that former President George W. Bush put them under. Finally, they…
Death Valley Records High Summer Temperatures. Sky Still Blue
Las Vegas, NV: In a news report this weekend that surprised no one, it has been learned that several western US states are in the midst of a heat wave,…
DOMA Crippled: Christian Right Prepares for Gay Apocalypse
New York, NY: After three months of deliberation, The United States Supreme Court dismissed the case of Hollingsworth v. Perry, which considered the constitutionality of California’s same-sex marriage ban (aka…
Texas Senate Aborts Abortion Bill Banning Abortions
Austin, TX: Early this morning, the Republican-dominated Texas Senate put aside its pro-life stance against abortion to do the unthinkable: abort an abortion bill that would ban most abortions after…