Alex Rodriguez Sues World Over PED Allegations
Alex Rodriguez responds to his 162-game suspension by suing everyone to prove his innocence.
Retail Store Takes 12 Hours to Complete Bitcoin Transaction
Retail stores plan to accept Bitcoin, no matter how long it may take.
T-Mobile Fails to Help Local Idiot Break Up with Girlfriend
Earlier his week, mobile communications company T-Mobile found a social media foothold that promises to take viral marketing by storm. Maybe too well.
NJ Traffic Scandal Labeled Military Exercise by Christie Supporters
Gov. Chris Christie's traffic scandal could be the next step in military strategy.
Polar Vortex Leads to Officially ‘Fucking Cold’ Temperatures
With twenty-six states in the midst of wind-chill warnings and other temperature alerts due to a polar vortex, meteorologists across the Midwest have finally come to an agreement: it's fucking…
US Government to Destroy Over 1,000 Tons of Elmo Dolls for Environmental Safety
Following the destruction of ivory, the United States takes aim at Elmo dolls.
Local Asshole Refuses to Have a Happy New Year
Happy New Year? No thanks, already had one.
North Korea Faxes South Korea Threatening Message Due to Faulty Dial-up Connection
The cutting edge technology of the North Korean military was displayed once again as officials in North Korea allegedly faxed a threat to the South Korea.
Shia LaBeouf Apologizes for Plagiarized Apology for Plagiarizing Dan Clowes
Shia LaBeouf just can't stop plagiarizing!
World Shocked that A&E Shocked by Duck Dynasty Star’s Bigoted Comments
In a recent news report that has surprised no one, bearded hillbilly patriarch Phil Robertson of the bearded hillbilly A&E reality show Duck Dynasty is believed to be a racist,…