Dear Owl,

   How would Rosie O’Donnell’s life had been if she was a woman in the workplace?


Used to Be Skinny in NY


   One of the things that you are assuming is that Rosie O’Donnell is not a woman. This is unfair, since her ancestry comes from a long line of actual sexless beings. Of course, these sexless beings are spoken of as brothers, implying that they are, of course, male, but they are imaginary. At least, that is what was believed, until Rosie O’Donnell came into being.

   The brothers I am speaking of are, of course, Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle-Dum. They cannot be considered truly male, I believe, because there are no women near them when Alice meets them in Wonderland. Instead, they fight over a rattle. Not very manly at all, if you ask me.

   Don’t believe me? Look at this side by side comparison.

Rosie O'Donnell






   The resemblance is eerie, even without the full body shots. 

   So as a Tweedle, I believe Rosie has followed his/her path in the industry quite well by being edgy, annoying, and complaining about everything. She’s done well.


Ask an Owl