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George W. Bush Presidential Library and Museum Resurrects Old Political Jokes

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Dallas, TX— It seemed too good to be true. George W. Bush, the former president of the United States who had launched hundreds of grammatically incorrect quotes and slogans, will be be opening a library.

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No one would be surprised if this was the spelling of the library.

Much to the pleasure of great political satirists and humorists such as Jon Stewart, Stephen Colbert, Lewis Black, and The Inept Owl, The George W. Bush Presidential Library and Museum, will be dedicated today and opened. While the box office receipts promise to be huge in regards to presidential libraries, it is speculated that a large ratio of visitors will be people who have missed cracking jokes about the former president.

“There really hasn’t been a good political joke since Bush left office,” stated political joke analyst Paul Emmerlan. “I’d like to be the first to say that this library will rectify this situation, without even needing to enter the building.”

Bush jokes based on grammar were a running franchise during President George W. Bush’s 8 years in the Oval office, launching three books and a video of “Bushisms.” some of the best anecdotes of the former president include:

“Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?”

“Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.”

“There’s an old saying in Tennessee — I know it’s in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on –shame on you. Fool me — you can’t get fooled again.”

“Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB-GYNs aren’t able to practice their love with women all across this country.”

“See, in my line of work you got to keep repeating things over and over and over again for the truth to sink in, to kind of catapult the propaganda.”

“Goodbye from the world’s biggest polluter.”

“They misunderestimated me.”

The opening of the library follows the just as ridiculous opening of the George W. Bush Institute, which has been compared to the idea of “The Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can’t Read Good and Wanna Learn to Do Other Stuff Good Too” from the movie Zoolander.

“Bush seems to follow pop culture, but is oblivious to what references like this are to,” explained Emmerlan. “Bush took a joke that could be considered about himself and make it into an even bigger joke by making the joke a reality. It makes me think that he’s either the greatest concept comedian since Andy Kaufman, or the world’s biggest idiot.”

The truth will be known today during the library’s dedication ceremony, for better or worse for Bush and the entire human race.

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Patrick is the man behind the man behind the site behind the man.... When he isn't writing for The Inept Owl, saving penguins from Hulk Hogan, and other activities that could be either truths or lies, he's editing everything else.

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