Los Angeles, CA: Actress/talk show host Rosie O’Donnell, who recently had a heart attack, vows to come back bigger than ever…if that’s possible. Rosie’s wife, Michelle Rounds, stated, “To say my hubby has a lot on her large back burner is an understatement.”

AP Photo/Evan Agostini

She announced that “Discovery Channel” along with “National Geographic” have teamed up to film a re-enactment of “The Donnell Party.”  Like the Donner Party in 1848, where starved and stranded settlers on their way to California resorted to cannibalism, “The Donnell Party” was an all-women caravan who got stranded on their way to Hollywood, California in 1908.  The caravan’s leader, who happened to be Rosie’s great-great-aunt, “Rita O. Donnell,” resorted to eating all the women until there was nothing more to eat, a trait Rosie O’Donnell still shares.  In this accurate reenactment, after a panicked Rita O. Donnell saw that one woman, Angie Jollee, escaped her all-women party to find a husband and success, Rita found, ate then married a new victim named Michelle Rounds.

After this epic wraps up filming, Ms. O’Donnell stated that she again will be a talk show host.  This time, she’ll be on the “Lifetime” network with a special edition of “Wife Swap.” On the opening episode, Rosie O’Donnell will swap wives with Ellen DeGeneres in order to see if the grass truly is greener on Portia DeRosa. It is unconfirmed if this is O’Donnell’s way of finding a new wife or not, but it does make sense for the fading star.

“Rosie O’Donnell is truly taking gay marriage up a notch,” stated Hollywood publicist Jack Reumer. “Eventually there was going to be a gay counterpart to Liza Minnelli. Why not Rosie?”