Palin Jealous of Kennedy’s Respect
Washington, DC: Alaska Governor Sarah Palin is lashing out at the press for what she perceives to be preferential treatment in regards to Caroline Kennedy’s bid for the soon-to-be empty…
Obama Supporters March on White House
Washington, DC: Early this morning, a gathering of about twenty thousand Obama supporters marched on the White House off of Pennsylvania Avenue, and proceeded to set up camp. Secret Service…
Millions Annoyed By Voting Machines
New York, NY: Voters are in a frenzy today, as the public has learned that normal voting machines were replaced with more contemporary and complicated vote compilers. While many past…
McCain Asks For Last Minute Debate
Washington DC: As political campaigns give their last push in these eight days leading up to Election Day, the McCain Camp is asking for extra time, and an extra debate…
Bush Moody Over Lack of Attention
Washington, DC: After viewing the second presidential debate between Barack Obama and John McCain Tuesday evening at the White House, currently forgotten President Bush set the ground work for his…
Candidates Debate Policies, Pizza Toppings
Oxford, MS: This past Friday, the entire free world witnessed the opening jabs, right-hooks, and over-all debate of Barack Obama and John McCain, the front-runners of the 2008 presidency of…
McCain’s Birth Certificate Located In Basement
Washington, D.C. –An intern at the Smithsonian Institution has discovered the whereabouts of presidential hopeful John McCain’s birth certificate in the most unlikely of places – a spider’s web in…
Vice-Presidential Possibilities
Finally, after months of campaigning, online voting, and tons of jokes about Dennis Kucinich and Ron Paul(assuming he is really finished and Ralph Nader isn't Ron Paul with color-treated hair),…
President Places Embargo on Future American Pie Movies
Washington, DC: In an effort to improve his popularity rating as his second term dwindles to a close, President Bush delighted the nation by placing an embargo upon Adam Herz…
Local Grump Registers Lawn as Nature Reserve
Stamford, CT: In honor of Earth Day, local complainer Sam Peterson recently registered his front yard with the National Park Service's nature reserve program in order to protect the various…