Basketball Fans Shocked that Dennis Rodman’s Odd Behavior in North Korea Took This Long
During his adventures in North Korea, Dennis Rodman alienates basketball fans...again.
North Korea Faxes South Korea Threatening Message Due to Faulty Dial-up Connection
The cutting edge technology of the North Korean military was displayed once again as officials in North Korea allegedly faxed a threat to the South Korea.
Anthropologists Uncover Missing Hillbilly Link of Evolution
New developments in the mating patterns of neanderthals point to hillbillies being the missing link on the evolutionary ladder.
Signer at Mandela Memorial Apologizes for “Fat Space Omelette”
The sign language interpreter at the memorial for Nelson Mandela apologized for his recent misinterpretations such as Fat Space Omelette.
Santorum Compares Mandela’s Fight Against Apartheid to First World US Problems
Rick Santorum recently compared Nelson Mandela to the crusty old white men of Congress in a declaration of honor.
Chris Farley Found Alive and Well in Toronto
It seems that Chris Farley is alive, and has been secretly running Toronto as his alter-ego, Rob Ford.
Special Agent Found Tied Up in Rucksack, Weighted Down with Cinder Blocks, and Locked Up With Chains’ Death Likely “Accidental”
After a full investigation, City of London Chief Inspector David Hammond has ruled the death of MI6 agent Richard Moore a “very unfortunate accident.”
North Koreans Executed for Watching George Clooney Movies
North Korea continued to put more pressure over its people as, earlier this month, eighty people were executed in public displays for watching George Clooney movies.
Russia Pleads for Snowden to Release Bogus Secrets on Website
To have Snowden performing analyses and maintenance on the site could allow the release of fake reports and foreign policy that would make Russia feared once again, by more than…
Scientists Celebrate Failure to Find Jack Shit in Dark Matter
Scientists were proud to exclaim that they haven't found jack shit in evidence of dark matter using the LUX.