Rob Zombie to Release Remakes of Classic Cartoons
This year marks a change in these cartoons' smooth ratings as musician/director/actor/chef/guy on the couch Rob Zombie is rumored to be releasing remade and redubbed versions of both of these…
Consumer Waits for “Next New Thing”
Benjamin Harrington didn't buy an iPhone when it first came out. He didn't fight shoppers to pick up a Wii gaming system when it first came out. The Blackberry and…
British Intelligence Uncovers Drunken Yankee on 4th of July
Local constables and MI personnel were put to the test yesterday as they unfoiled terrorist activity in the area of Hyde Park. Londoners had called in about a young male…
Police Unveil New Reason to be Mocked
They're not just for wealthy eccentrics anymore. The police department of the City of Long Beach has jumped on the latest trend for slow travel with minimal perspiration. Last week…
Gonzales Blames Alcohol
WASHINGTON, D.C.- In the aftermath of Attorney General Alberto R. Gonzales’ testimony in front of the Senate Judiciary Committee, Gonzales has come under intense scrutiny because of his lack of…
Chris “Corky” Burke Stuns Oscars
The audience at this year’s Academy Awards was stunned as Chris Burke was called up to the stage to receive his Lifetime Achievement Award. It was not the fact that…
Britney Unleashed, Again
It has been two weeks since Britney Spears attacked photographers with an umbrella outside of Kevin Federline's home. Besides her newly shaved head, twitching eyes, and the tendency to bite…
Paranoid Terror from Above
Visitors of Central Park were caught up in a nightmare Sunday as F-16 Fighting Falcons were deployed and shot down a plane flying in restricted airspace. The pilot of the…
Marriage Proposal Given New “Old-Fashioned” Spin
With the eye-opening fiction of the diamond trade in theaters, women are becoming apprehensive about receiving diamond engagement rings. Upon looking at the brilliant, multi-faceted jewel, feminine sympathy has brought…