Pettitte Re-Signs, Resigns, then Re-Signs Again with Yankees
Tampa, FL: The roster confusion within the New York Yankees continues, as perennial Yankee Andy Pettitte once again signed with the team, this time to a minor league deal with…
Manning to Try Out Teams for 2012 Season
Tempe, AZ: The release of 4-time NFL MVP quarterback and perennial forehead Peyton Manning by the Indianapolis Colts has sent shock-waves through the rest of the NFL as teams struggle…
My Visit to Westeros: A Game of Thrones Mis-Adventure
It is obvious that I'm a fan of Game of Thrones. I have written character descriptions, comparing many of them to beer, and then more beer. I have practiced ways…
Boba Fett Denies Part in Saints Defense
New Orleans, LA: The latest entry as "America's Team" was delivered a crippling sack this past weekend, as former players opened allegations of knowledge and support of a bounty program…
Unborn Snooki Monster Right on Time, Says Mayan Calendar
Jersey City, NJ: For years, skeptics and conspiracy theorists alike have debated the meaning and relevancy of the Mayan calendar. The ancient timeline, which ends on December 21st, 2012, has…
German Chancellor Loses St. Pauli Girl Wet T-Shirt Contest
Demmin, GERMANY: Confusion struck the nation of Germany, and indeed the world, when Chancellor Angela Merkel was doused in beer during a Christian Democratic Union meeting last week. What had…
Abe Vigoda: Killing Death Pools for 91 Years
New York, NY: For years, reports of his death proved to be premature, over and over again. A website was erected in order to tell the world of his true…
Curt Schilling Reality Video Game Ready to Hit Shelves
Boston, MA: After over five years and almost $35 million, the impossible has happened: the Curt Schilling video game has arrived for computer and gaming consoles everywhere. Not to be…
Man Depressed by Valentine from Mother
Los Angeles, CA: It didn't take long for David Platt to feel the sharp blade of Valentine's Day cut away the last bits of his self-esteem. What had begun as…
Great Moments in Walking Dead History: Getting Ready for Mid-Season 2
For the past decade, our human lust for apocalyptic destruction and despair has been described with one word: zombies. Zombies have taken over literature with such Pulitzer Prize-winning novel such…