Harvard Coffee Poisoning Not an Accident
Boston, MA: One of six Harvard Medical School researchers, who became ill after drinking coffee laced with a toxic chemical, says he does not see how the incident could have…
Patrick Swayze Returns from the Dead
Patrick Swayze, who recently died after a 20-month battle with pancreatic cancer, has been reanimated, his publicist confirmed to ABC News. He remains 57. "Patrick was peacefully reanimated today with…
Celebrate Blood Night: A Movie Review
With the release of Blood Night: The Legend of Mary Hatchet, we are given the best of both worlds; a movie made by fans(in horror afficionado/director Frank Sabatella), for fans,…
Colorado Authorities Rescue Silver Balloon-Thing
This past Thursday, both state and local authorities found themselves in a race against time as they attempted an intricate, and possibly fatal, extraction operation over the plains of Colorado.…
Romo Sues Merriam-Webster For Douchebag Definition
Dallas, TX: Tony Romo, mired in an up and down start the last few years, has taken it upon himself to sue Merriam-Webster for their recent updated entry of the…
Swayze’s Widow Discusses What She Won’t Do Now
Hollywood, CA: Two months have passed since Patrick Swayze’s death from pancreatic cancer, and his widow has opted to appear on Oprah for a one-on-one interview with the uber rich…
Gun-Toting Soccer Mom Shot Dead
A very homely soccer mom, who gained national attention when she openly carried a loaded gun to her 5-year-old daughter's game, was shot dead Wednesday along with her husband in…
Government Proposes 1-Hour Work Week
Washington, DC--Faced with a burgeoning budget deficit, today the Obama administration unveiled a plan to help cut down government spending: a one-hour work week. The plan is a federal mandate,…
Late Night Fails at Mocking Letterman
Late night talk shows took a step back last week, with one of the most agitating and disgusting acts ever attained by a late night talk show host: utter failure…