Cupertino, CA: Today at a video conference from Apple Headquarters in Cupertino, California, CEO and co-founder Steve Jobs revealed the latest innovation from the technology giant: the iShirt.
Jobs said, “It is the next generation of apparel, designed for the highly discerning individual. It is made of the finest, most high-tech materials known to man. In fact, the material is actually invisible to anyone not of sufficient intellect. The shirts are lightweight and comfortable. And at only $500 apiece, they are the must-have item this year.”
Critics have roundly praised the iShirt as being the most beautiful garment to have been invented in decades. “The color is magnificent,” wrote one reporter. “The patterns are exquisite.” The editors at Cnet.com gave the iShirt a 10/10 rating in their 
review, and praised it as a revolution in clothing technology.
Meanwhile, Mac-heads have already started camping out in front of Apple stores, waiting for their chance at the iShirt. Raymond Finkle, who was first in line at the Apple Store in Des Moines, Iowa, said, “I’ve seen high-resolution pictures online. I’ve read all the product specs. I have to have this shirt, no matter what the cost. I was also the first on my block to have an iPhone and a MacBook Air. Sure, I now live on the streets because I couldn’t afford rent, but we all have sacrifices to make.”
Jobs further said that they plan to expand into the pants and skirt market as soon as Apple has established itself in the realm of shirts. “Once we’ve gotten to our golden benchmark for market domination—10 percent—we’ll move on to the next product. Ideally, we would like to see all the best-looking and most distinguishing people in the world to be decked head-to-toe in iClothing.” Critics quickly agreed.
In the meantime, PC makers are scrambling to come up with a product to fill the other 90% of the market void. Microsoft itself has developed a prototype for a t-shirt. It is six inches thick, weighs 50 pounds, and is currently only available in death-screen blue. Early prototypes have proven unstable and are prone to falling apart when used with other company’s garments. It is also not believed to be compatible with older models of pants, so users will have to wait for a patch to be designed within the next several months.
Naturally, open-source Linux advocates have come up with a third option. It’s a patchwork garment, made up of dozens of pieces made by different people and thrown together whenever they can find time to come together. It has four arm holes and two head holes (just in case the need arises), and nobody other than the people who designed it know how to wear it.
For the moment, demand seems very high for this new product. Oddly enough, the Apple stores claim to have sufficient numbers in stock to meet the needs of the customers; therefore, for the first time in history, Apple may actually be able to match the demand for one of its products.
All 10 percent of it.