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The Cynical Comedian’s View on Gay Marriage


While the Supreme Court justices decide how to vote to repeal Proposition 8 without looking too “gay”, and how to vote to keep Proposition 8 without looking too ridiculous, we went ahead and found some clips of people who really put the idea of gay marriage in perspective: comedians.


Louis C.K.

“It doesn’t have ANY effect on your life. What do you care? People try to talk about it like it’s a social issue. Like when you see someone stand up on a talk show and say ‘How am I supposed to explain to my child that two men are getting married?’ I dunno, it’s your shitty kid, you fuckin’ tell ’em. Why is that anyone else’s problem? Two guys are in LOVE but they can’t get married because YOU don’t want to talk to your ugly child for five fuckin’ minutes?”



Lewis Black

“Apparently the heterosexuals have reached a point where they’re are so fucked up that we better write it down in case we forget who we’re supposed to marry.”



College Humor

“As gay men ourselves, we would just like to say to those people, ‘Fine. Keep marriage between a man and a woman. And in response, we will marry your girlfriends.'”


Jim Jefferies

“If you don’t believe in gay marriage, you’re a dickhead…because it has nothing to do with you.”



Doug Stanhope

“Baby, this shit we got together is so good we gotta get the government in on this shit.”



Daniel Tosh

“I’m actually all for gay marriage. Just the thought of having a man around the house…”


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Patrick is the man behind the man behind the site behind the man.... When he isn't writing for The Inept Owl, saving penguins from Hulk Hogan, and other activities that could be either truths or lies, he's editing everything else.

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