Recent Articles
World Wishes Kiefer Sutherland Had Made Freddie Prinze, Jr. Quit Acting
Freddie Prinze, Jr, star of such Oscar-worthy films as She’s All That, Scooby Doo, and the critically acclaimed film Summer Catch, has lashed out at 24 star Keifer Sutherland
US Wags Finger Forcefully at Palestine
Throughout the past few weeks, Palestine has launched tens of rockets across the border, destroying almost an acre of corn, killing two lambs and starting a small fire in a National park.
Georgia Enables Guns Everywhere Law at Worst Possible Time
Georgia’s new firearm law, the Safe Carry Protection Act aka the “GUNS EVERYWHERE!” law according to gun control advocates, was enabled on July 1st, 2014. Bad timing?
Officials Horrified by How Sketch Artist Depicted Dead Wisconsin Woman Stuffed in a Suitcase
While the idea of two naked, rotting women stuffed into suitcases and left on the side of the road during the summer may seem like the most disturbing element of this case, the Lake Geneva Police Department added to the gruesomeness when an artist’s rendering of one of the deceased was released.
Tinder Lawsuit Evidence Not as Funny when Replacing “Dick” with “Penis”
A sexual harassment lawsuit made great strides yesterday in eradicating the humor of word usage when representatives of plaintiff Whitney Wolfe introduced evidence where defendant Sean Rad had sent her a text subtly referring to his boss Barry Diller as a “penis.”
Ann Coulter Doesn’t Know Soccer, or Sports in General
Ann Coulter goes off on soccer as I go off on her for going off on soccer.
Rodman Cancels North Korea Visit Due to Seth Rogen Movie
With Seth Rogen’s politically charged comedy, The Interview, creating more buzz than an army of George Bush Jr. clones, vacation travel by to North Korea has dropped by almost 90%.
Eric Cantor Defeated in Primary by Small Guppy Named Pedro
House Majority Leader Eric Cantor was handed an historic defeat in the Republican primary yesterday by a local house pet.
Pitbull On Schedule to Release Another Piece of Shit Album
Fans of corporate and thoughtless music rejoiced today in the news that Pitbull is on schedule to release yet another giant piece of shit.
Jack White’s Ego to Release Solo Album
After several years of notable collaboration, Jack White’s Ego announced he is splitting with his mentor in favor of making his own music.
