Browsing: Staff Bios

Staff Bios
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While many believe that, behind the scenes, The Inept Owl is run by perverted gnomes high on PCP, it is untrue. There is only one perverted gnome, and he’s only high on life and computer duster spray: Webmaster P.

Staff Bios
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Meg Anne is a Yankee-turned-Southern Belle. Born in the great state of New Jersey, her parents had enough sense to spirit her out of the Garden State before Jersey Shore gave it a bad rep. She now hails from the North of the two Carolinas, where the tea is sweet and the culture is one-dimensional.

Staff Bios
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Steve Elle is an incredibly talented yarn-spinner. He knows how to build a story and wring out its punch line and significance so well that you’d think he was raised by an ancient tribe of devoted oral historians. And, well, you would have had the ancient tribe part right, anyway. He has sense enough to know that Gossip Girl and So You Think You Can Dance? should be enjoyed both genuinely and also not. He knows this balance, and so his writing toes a line between mocking and praising his subjects, just without the praise part. Irony without affection; not wink-wink irony, just wink irony. That’s the real key to his success, not that he has ever really had any.

Staff Bios
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Unlike the vast majority of The Inept Owl’s writers, J-Sin was not created by the partnership of two human beings. Instead, he sprung forth from a savanna in central Kenya in the late 1970s, free from the burden of parentage, and a child of nature. But he is no hippie.

His first few years were spent foraging through the grasslands for food, water, and women. He succeeded on all levels and it was during this time that he discovered Mountain Dew.

Staff Bios
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Moon Beam Crenshaw has been studying the stars and their affect on our daily lives for 38 years. He gained his degree in astrology at Woodstock during a mud orgy, and has been telling people what to do since. As our horoscope columnist, he will be giving you tips about how to live your life based on the star alignments he sees from his porch in Iowa.

Staff Bios
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Rob was born in Essex, not too far from London in the UK, in the mid 1960’s.
He made an early impression on his school teachers, managing to get himself excluded from class in his very first academic year (aged four & a half), for apparently knowing more than the Teachers, & refusing to shut up. Sent to work in the School library for most of that year, Rob developed an affinity for skipping classes & hiding behind shelving…Oh yeah, the books were pretty cool too.

Staff Bios
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We would like to welcome Kipp Wieland to our little satirical Manson family. Kipp will be honoring us with a bit of social commentary spanning from artistic integrity to comparisons between the cereals Pops™ and Smacks™(at least, I think that’s what he’ll be doing.)

So, as a biography, I give you Kipp’s introductory letter.

Staff Bios
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When the child was finally born, the romantic idea of growing up in the city came to an end. Patrick was brought to the outskirts of suburbia on Long Island, and later into the heart of it in a Levit home. It was here that Patrick learned of building snowmen, football, and how to pine away at women much older than him. At 6 years old, 10 was considered way out of his league, which was the exact age of the cute blonde who lived next door to him. Through emotional turmoil such as this, it can be assumed that Patrick would be easily led to writing. Instead, thanks to odd but rather normal family situations, Patrick fantasized about becoming a lawyer and, later on, a therapist. Although the time to run to Law School is at an end, he still listens to people’s problems, although they are usually problems people have with him.

Staff Bios
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Editor’s note: Music reviewer Darby Shaw did not submit the bio we requested from him some time ago; apparently he wasn’t kidding about the tardiness issue. Instead, we will post his application e-mail. It really says all we need to know about him.