Trump Changes Dates for 9-11, Fourth of July

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Buffalo, NY – In an attempt to dissuade critics of his speeches, knowledge, politics, campaign, hair, and everything else about him, Donald Trump triple-downed in the media today when he referred to New York’s date of infamy, 9/11, as 7-Eleven with no correction or even awareness that the numbers were incorrect.

The 9/11 date gaffe happened on April 18th, the Monday before New York’s primaries.

I wrote this out, and it’s very close to my heart because I was down there and I watched our police and our firemen down on 7-11, down at the World Trade Center right after it came down… Donald Trump

Most New Yorkers find themselves accidentally saying “9/11” in conversation instead of whatever numbers they meant to say, due to the tragic impact of that day. Donald Trump, however, found no fault in the numbers he stated because, well, Donald Trump.

“Donald Trump doesn’t exist on the same plane as mere mortals,” discussed local Trump supporter Allan Kippen. “He doesn’t abide to factual dates. He makes up his own, which then become the factual dates. As it is, the World Trade Center towers fell on July 11, 2001. So has Trump said, and so it shall be.”

Instead of admitting that Donald Trump may have made a mistake, Kippen went on to list other dates that Trump had changed in discussions, such as the 4th of July, Cinco de Mayo, January 1st. Kippen also stated that Trump “will correct those dates when he becomes president. No, not his statements. The dates themselves.”

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