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Asinine Election Analysis 2016: Rick Santorum

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Our asinine political analysis breaks down Republican presidential candidate Rick Santorum.

*UPDATE: Rick Santorum has suspended his presidential campaign to focus on putting out an Oscar-worthy film from his faith-based film studio.*

rick-santorum-profile

Name: Rick Santorum

Nickname: Rooster

Political Affiliation: Republican Party

Status: Suspended Campaign

Known For: U.S. Representative 1991 – 1995, U.S. Senator 1995 – 2007, Protecting rapists’ rights to force women to give birth to their children

Likes: Intelligent Design, Guns, NASCAR, Fantasy Baseball

Dislikes: Gay Marriage, Climate Change, Free Weather Info

Public Outlook: Rick Santorum seems to have a faith-based approach to conservatism, which has him leaning over the right-side cliff. It is believed that such a president could mandate Christian prayer in schools to replace the pledge of allegiance, and ship every non-white person that had arrived in the United States after 1955 out of the country. This includes trying to push Hawaii out of the fifty states.

Pros: Santorum is unwavering is his political resolutions.

Cons: Santorum is unwavering is his political resolutions.

Quote: “President Obama once said he wants everybody in America to go to college. What a snob.”

Check out all of the 2016 presidential candidates by clicking here.

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Patrick is the man behind the man behind the site behind the man.... When he isn't writing for The Inept Owl, saving penguins from Hulk Hogan, and other activities that could be either truths or lies, he's editing everything else.

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