ICYWYMI: Jeb Bush Better Off Hurling Cash Into Crowds

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Welcome back to another entry of In Case You Wish You Missed It, the news you wish wouldn’t happen but, somehow, does.

In a recent analysis, it has been approximated that Republican presidential campaigner Jeb Bush has spent $58.8 million in advertising in order to be behind almost every other Republican candidate in Iowa Caucus polls with around a 5% approval rating. That’s almost $59 million spent so that the nation can tell you that they’d rather have Ben Carson as their president.

In Bush’s defense, he had a Grand Canyon of a hole to climb out of after his brother, George W. Bush, dug it for 8 years in order to put a compost pile in his garden.

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Maybe Jeb Bush should have taken a page from the 1800s when campaign managers were giving immigrants a dollar to vote once they got off the boat from Ellis Island. With the kind of campaign money he’s spent so far, Bush could have staged big, ticker tape-like rallies where he just dumped piles of dollar bills on his supporters, and just not make it illegal by never saying, “Vote for me.” I would have shown up for that, with a big garbage bag.

But let’s be honest. Promising tax cuts is how politicians bride the public these days. The only difference is, back then politicians just gave you the money. Here’s a dollar and a pin. Put one in your pocket, the other on your hat. Tax cuts are more like IOU’s written in pencils with really, really big aftermarket erasers.

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Patrick is the man behind the man behind the site behind the man…. When he isn’t writing for The Inept Owl, saving penguins from Hulk Hogan, and other activities that could be either truths or lies, he’s editing everything else.

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