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Pitbull On Schedule to Release Another Piece of Shit Album

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Pitbull's duckface is as played out as his music. (Getty)

Pitbull’s duckface is as played out as his music. (Getty)

Fans of corporate and thoughtless music rejoiced today in the news that Pitbull is on schedule to release yet another giant piece of shit.  The album, to be released this fall, has confirmed appearances from other famous sellouts like Will.I.Am, Lil Jon, and the still-alive Flo Rida.

The new album, entitled Pepsi, is said to feature multiple dance songs with a heavy electronic, radio-friendly presence.  No word has been released yet on whether there will be a Latin influence on the music, but Pitbull has noted there will be plenty of Spanish gibberish for fans to sing along with.

The artist has expressed excitement at the unique manner in which the music will be released. “It comes out in October, but you can hear it in commercials and party scenes in coming-of-age movies prior to its release”.

When asked about where he got the inspiration for the album Pitbull stated: “I was talking to David Guetta about money, and something just clicked.”

Guetta also commented on the now-famous conversation between the two: “Yeah, money is dope.”

“Da le,” added Pitbull.

Pitbull is also expected to embark on a universal tour, making stops in all major North American and European cities, in addition to a handful of shows in Thailand and the International Space Station.  This will be Pitbull’s 43rd album, and his 41st piece of shit.

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