venezuela_vuvuzela

Caracas, VENEZUELA— Weeks of civil unrest and dissent reached its boiling point in the South American country of Venezuela yesterday, as thousands of citizens gathered at the nation’s capital to show their solidarity in a protest to change their country for the better.

That protest, of course, is against the vuvuzela, the giant, plastic horn that gained notoriety and hatred at the 2010 FIFA World Cup in South Africa.

“For years, our country has been plagued by the ignorant assumption that the vuvuzela originated in our great country of Venezuela, just because the words are so similar,” stated Ronald McKenzie, an American transfer student in Caracas. “It is time to put an end to the vuvuzela’s reign, and let the people take back the pride of Venezuela.”

A few vuvuzelas could be seen in the crowds gathering in Caracas, many held by other American students excited to be a part of Venezuela’s history. Most of the vuvuzelas were marked with slogans such as “MANIFESTAR” and “VENEZUELA PRIMERO.”

Not all citizens at the protests were so defiant, as a gang of supposed vuvuzela enthusiasts arrived and open fire on the protestors with their vuvuzelas, killing 4 people, including a police officer, with their loud, vibrating horn blows. The protests had erupted throughout the country of Venezuela over the past week, but this was the only incident that had turned violent.

Update: Upon further research, it has been confirmed that the protests are in opposition of President Nicolas Maduro, not vuvuzelas.

By Patrick AE

Patrick is the man behind the man behind the site behind the man.... When he isn't writing for The Inept Owl, saving penguins from Hulk Hogan, and other activities that could be either truths or lies, he's editing everything else.