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Volcker Rule Raises Eyes in Banks, Vegas

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Las Vegas, NV: With the adoption of the latest Dodd-Frank financial overhaul law, dubbed “the Volcker Rule,” set to be implemented in 2015, banks aren’t the only companies scurrying for shelter.

After the Volcker Rule was announced, casinos in Las Vegas, NV instantaneously raised their lodging rates, restaurant prices, and began charging for free events like “The Fall of Atlantis” at Caesars Palace in the hopes of recouping a meager portion of money they would be losing from frequent visits by bankers, brokers, and other financial planners.

The Volcker Rule was implemented to regulate how far banks could go in speculative trading with the assets of their clients without proper risk identification. In essence, banks were gambling in the market with their clients’ assets, which were then insured by the federal government through the FDIC.

Another aspect of speculation that would be regulated are trips by CEOs, financial planners, and brokers, as they will now need to outline risk and reward analysis when they take giant briefcases of money with them on trips to Vegas in order to “play the market” on “business trips.”

“I may be out of a job,” stated financial planner Trent Dobner. “I’ve started at least 100 hedge funds with the only speculation being on my ability to get as war into Texas Hold ‘Em poker tournaments as possible. I’m sure this type of financial speculation will be the first to go.”

Other financial advisers and brokers are just as worried, since putting $100,000 on red and spinning a giant wheel may now be considered reckless market speculation.

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