blockbuster
photo courtesy of blockbuster.com

New York, NY: In a press release to the public today, Blockbuster, the home movie rental company that had introduced the American family to such historical relics as “VHS tapes” and “DVDs,” surprised consumers by alerting them to the fact that, yes, Blockbuster is still in business.

That news was quickly followed with the fact that Blockbuster was so “still in business” that the company planned to close its 300 remaining U.S. stores by early January next year following the canning of its mail-order rental distribution in mid-December.

The news came as a shock to the public. Not the idea of Blockbuster being liquidated and, for all intents and purposes shutting down, but the fact that the company was still in operation at all.

“I can’t even remember the last time I saw a Blockbuster logo,” stated film fanatic Marshall Drucker. “I think it was back when I watched the used copy of Zoolander that I bought from the store years ago. And before you say it, yes, it was an awesome enough movie to watch again.”

Despite seeing the home movie business over-saturated by Video on Demand, Netflix, Amazon, XBOX Live, Redbox, Hulu, and the general discounting of DVDs on sale, Blockbuster tried time and again to battle these new business models by incorporating them into their own model. This eventually led to the dismantling of what many believed to be all Blockbuster stores nationwide. Most consumers vaguely remember a Blockbuster commercial having to do with CGI gerbils or guinea pigs, but the time of the commercial is still unknown.

While the physical stores may be closed, Blockbuster, now owned by Dish Network, still believes it has value in the home movie community. Their latest endeavor will be an online “streaming” service, much like every other online movie-streaming service.

By Patrick AE

Patrick is the man behind the man behind the site behind the man.... When he isn't writing for The Inept Owl, saving penguins from Hulk Hogan, and other activities that could be either truths or lies, he's editing everything else.