Honolulu, HI: While most fans, players, coaches, owners, towel boys, and Roger Goodell had all but written off the Pro Bowl to be gone after this year, there was one man that held out in the hopes of the Pro Bowl gaining some sort of legitimacy. This man as been known to bring his own show to the field, but never wavers in his focus on officiating the football game first and foremost. That man is Ed Hochuli.


The idea that the Pro Bowl is all but taken seriously was apparent to anyone who bothered watching the game.

* Players were given a “Tweet Tent” to connect to fans during the game. Some players didn’t even bother with that and kept their cell phones strapped to their waist due to the lack of hitting whenever Ndamukong Suh wasn’t on the field.

* J.J. Watt accidentally got ketchup on his face while eating a hot-dog, and was mandated by Commissioner Roger Goodell to not wipe it off under penalty of a fine because it “looked good”.

* Former Indianapolis Colts center Jeff Saturday officially played for the other team when he switched from the NFC team to the AFC team for one snap in order to feel former Indianapolis Colts quarterback Peyton Manning’s strong hand on his taint for one last time.

* New York Giants quarterback Eli Manning forgets what teams would be playing in Super Bowl XLVII.

Field officials, however, refused to let the Pro Bowl die due to faulty calls after the referee circus that went on with the replacement refs at the beginning of the season, as pass interference was called on Champ Bailey.

Referee Ed Hochuli stoically explained that, “Yes there are penalties in the Pro Bowl” before making the call on Bailey and forcing teams to play just .01 % better throughout the rest of the game.

By Patrick AE

Patrick is the man behind the man behind the site behind the man.... When he isn't writing for The Inept Owl, saving penguins from Hulk Hogan, and other activities that could be either truths or lies, he's editing everything else.

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