Horrible Horoscopes: Week of 1-10-2012

Aries

ARIES

You need to deal with a parental issue. That could mean dealing with your kids, your parents, or whoever you enjoy S&M with.

 

 

 

 


Taurus

TAURUS

Your good energy is keeping you happy and feeling good today, so make sure that you’re pushing yourself a bit and getting yourself out in the world. Just shade that happiness, lest some people try to kill you to feed on your essence.

 

 

 

 


Gemini

GEMINI

If a friend is being tight with money, it doesn’t mean they don’t want to hang out. They just want you to pay for everything.

 

 

 

 


Cancer

CANCER

Your energy levels are getting higher, so make sure that you’re dealing with the projects and people that mean the most to you. That way people won’t think you’re coked out or having a ‘roid rage.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


Leo

LEO

You can get along with almost anyone right now, so try to spend time with those neglected annoying people, like Pauley Shore and the women of “Real Housewives of Wherever the Hell They Are Now”.

 

 

 

 


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