Indianapolis, IN: With the implosion of usefulness to the NFL’s Indianapolis Colts after the neck surgery of franchise player/quarterback/coach/offensive, defensive, and special teams coordinator Peyton Manning, trade rumors have surfaced as the Colts become legitimate contenders to draft Andrew Luck as well as be labeled the worst team in NFL history.

The only thing standing in their way is the contract of MVP quarterback Peyton Manning, as the price of their franchise quarterback and the price needed to retain a #1 draft pick would likely force the Colts to sell their new stadium. While Manning may have a few more exceptional years left in his arm, Luck would be heralded as a future Manning with plenty more years. The question is, would Luck be able to play the role Manning has had in the Colts organization?

With a recent trade debate, the answer is simple: give the Indianapolis Colts the first two rounds of the 2012 draft as compensation for losing Manning.

“Peyton Manning is almost irreplaceable as a player, but as a game manager as well,” explained Colts head coach Jim Caldwell. “He organizes players and plays on the offensive side of the ball, gives the defense time to rest, and generally wins or loses games himself, mostly winning. Hell, it makes my job of holding his playbook that much easier. To lose Peyton Manning, as we’ve seen, would call for a complete overhaul of our team, top to bottom. Two rounds of draft picks would come close to helping.”

While a 32-team trade seems the best compensation for the Colts, many teams are unwilling to pull the trigger if they are not the lucky organization to land Manning.

“The trade only makes sense if it is to a team in the CFL, so we never have to deal with him again,” stated Patriots quarterback Tom Brady. “Why should we give up picks if we’re just going to have to play another team he’s on?”

By Patrick AE

Patrick is the man behind the man behind the site behind the man.... When he isn't writing for The Inept Owl, saving penguins from Hulk Hogan, and other activities that could be either truths or lies, he's editing everything else.