New York, NY: The end of 2010 is upon us, but yearly critics say 2011 won’t begin much better. The cause: horribly designed novelty glasses and a rhyme scheme that makes a song about twenty-eleven seem impossible.
Whereas most novelty glasses for the previous New Year’s Eve festivities had an easily readable numeric pattern, 2011 eye-wear will be breaking tradition, creating the year of the “U”. It is unknown if this will create a less egotistical new year, or 20-U will brandish less, “uh”, decision-making.
“They should have just replaced the ‘0’ with a heart. Then at least people could have a bit more to look forward to,” stated Times Square visitor Nancy Thomas.
Another dilemma is the use of 2011 in any music composition, which always perks up a new year. Partying like it’s 1999 was an easy link to last decade’s Y2K. This year will prove much harder to create a proper rhyme scheme in a song.
“The year 2000 was amazing. Prince, Dr. Dre, they all had great songs. Now we have to deal with a 2 syllable, 3 syllable set-up for songs,” commented music producer David Geffen. “I’m sure Justin Bieber can set up some garbage song, but what will that prove?”