Wantagh, NY: Fans of the 90’s alternative rock sensation Stone Temple Pilots were stunned by their reunion show at the Nikon Theater at Jones Beach  in August when the band came onstage merely thirty minutes after the opening band, Black Rebel Motocycle Club. The timing caused the complacent crowd to riot, pulling up chairs and accosting security guards.

   “I was pissed! The last time I went to see them in New Jersey it took an hour and a half to get Stone Temple PilotsScott Weiland on stage, so I thought I had some time to snort a few lines in the restrooms. Then I heard ‘Big Empty’ playing when I was still in the stall, and went ape-sh*t,” concert-goer Jonathan Bergen explained.

   The last time Stone Temple Pilots played in the tri-state area, at the PNC Bank Arts Center in Holmdel, New Jersey, the crowd waited for an hour and a half while technicians, promoters, management, band members, and a gang of howler monkeys tried to rouse front-man Scott Weiland from an alleged drug-induced slumber. Allegedly, lead guitarist Dean DeLeo mocked Weiland to get him to come out, screaming, “Come on, Axl! Let’s go Axl!” but to no avail. The band was booed as it went on stage, and Scott Weiland gave one of the worst-sounding performances of his career.

   “After the PNC disaster, we knew there was only one way we could be sure Scott got on stage on time. We locked him in a kennel next to the Jones Beach stage around noon, and didn’t let him out until he had to be on stage at 9:15 in the evening,” explained K-Rock promoter Lance Kendall.

   The strategy worked. Unfortunately, the crowd was not prepared for Stone Temple Pilots to begin their show a half hour after Black Rebel Motorcycle Club ended their set. Half of the concert hall was empty when Stone Temple Pilots came on stage, and the rush for seats caused a riot that left twenty people and five secuirty guards injured before the band could finish its first song.

   “Really, what’s the world coming to when major rock stars start their shows on time. Next time I go to a show, I’ll probably sit there urinating on myself so I don’t miss the opening song. And let me tell you, that won’t be a pretty sight,” commented Bergen.

By Patrick AE

Patrick is the man behind the man behind the site behind the man.... When he isn't writing for The Inept Owl, saving penguins from Hulk Hogan, and other activities that could be either truths or lies, he's editing everything else.