London, UK: The House Of Lords recently passed a bill to remove the blasphemy laws from English statute books. This still needs to be passed by the House Of Commons to become official, but it looks likely.

   There are two main reasons given for rendering blasphemy legal in the UK. The first is to give the UK Government the moral high ground in international cases of ‘Religious Excess’ – the recent story of the British school-teacher who mistakenly named the class Teddy Bear “Mohammed” and incurred the wrath of Allah for her troubles, and the whole business last year of the newspaper that printed cartoons of The Prophet Mohammed and also incurred the wrath of Allah, (he gets about a bit), are just two cases in point.

   Not unexpectedly, the UK Government wants to jump on the band-wagon and condemn the religious fanaticism that lurks behind such stories, but would risk British Lawbeing exposed as the hypocrites they are, unless they remove the blasphemy laws from the statute books of Great Britain first. It’s sort of sticking it’s chin out, inviting the first punch, just so it can retaliate with a flying head-butt, a fine basis for making laws, don’t you think?

   The second and more intriguing reason given was that the current law is “Unworkable.” Removing a law from the statute books because it is difficult to police may seem a bit of a cop-out . After extensive research, however, it seems this attitude of making the unworkable obselete has been going on for years here, largely unnoticed.

   It seems that it was getting far too hard to teach kids anything in schools with teachers not being allowed to hit students or take drugs in the classroom anymore. The whole system was becoming utterly unworkable. Now, they just have the students stand in a line while someone throws A and B grade exam results at them in a random fashion. “It’s a lot easier than trying to teach, and we get great results, and now i’m free to take drugs in the classroom,” a teacher was misquoted earlier.

   Other laws are now being looked at. For years solving murder cases has been a bane of police life, what with one participant dead, and the other normally hotfooting it away, the law is basically unworkable and now looks as though it may also be scrapped.
“This will give us more time for proper Police duties, like providing taxi services for drunks, and shooting Brazilians,” a police officer was heard thinking earlier today.