Today, the Writers Guild of America continued their workers strike for residuals from online sales. Picketing writers displayed signs saying, “We told you Leno needed us” and “You thought T.V was bad, now it’s worse.” A writer we spoke with told us, “We’re in this for the long haul. We want our share of the industry, so get ready for lots of re-runs if this doesn’t get resolved soon.” He then added, “Can I get paid for this interview?”

     Nielsen Television ratings have drastically dropped. Networks have tried to revive old sitcoms from the 70s to fill air time, but many shows such as All In The Family, Sanford & Son, Good Times, and the Jefferson’s are now considered politically incorrect with their racial undertones and innuendos.Academy Awards

     The current writers strike in Hollywood has given producers in the entertainment world the idea to seek material from political advisors, writers, and government officials. A few producers we interviewed requested to remain anonymous as a condition to speak with us.

     One producer said, “These days, the propaganda machine in Washington D.C. is incredible. The stories they are able to spin and sell to the public as truth and fact is amazing. We finally decided to turn to D.C. for material. Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert do it all the time. We realized we had somewhere to go for brilliant work.” He then added, “Besides, if anyone messes with us we’ve got the Fed’s on our side.”

     With the Academy Awards soon approaching, we asked another anonymous producer what the plans are for this year’s presentation. He stated, “If we’re not able to get a few celebrities to host and attend, we’ll be forced to cancel the show.” Producers of the awards ceremony are trying in a last minute effort to invite such stars as Siegfried & Roy, Pee Wee Herman, Tommy Lee, Jenna Jameson, Carrot Top, Flavor Flav, Kid Rock, Tila Tequila, Danny Bonaduce, Pamela Anderson, Marilyn Manson, Barney the Dinosaur, Carson Daly, and Johnny Fairplay . The choices were specifically aimed to gather people who had no idea what a writer is or does.

     The producer who granted us an interview based on his anonymity stated, “We’re hoping to pull this show off and get it to broadcast. We’ve designated the seating arrangements. Kid Rock and Danny Bonaduce are at the same table. Next to them we have Tommy Lee and Johnny Fairplay. We’ve got a bottle of Jack Daniels on their tables. If the show is going slow and we need some exciting entertainment, we’re counting on them getting liquored up and continuing their on-air celebrity brawls.”

     Keeping the pace of this new partnership between Hollywood and Washington, political figures such as Bill and Hillary Clinton, President Bush’s daughters Jenna and Barbara Bush, former D.C Mayor Marion Barry, and senator Larry Craig were also invited to attend the awards show.Presiding over the debacle will be political satirist Jon Stewart.

     Former President Bill Clinton has a pending request for a private meeting with Jenna Jameson after the show to discuss global warming and the possibility of legalizing Cuban cigars.