Recent Articles
Paul Walker Death Apparently Not Related to International Street Racing Crime Sydicate
Paul Walker died in a car crash on Saturday, leading many to wonder if it had to do with a rival street racing team from Russia or China.
Walmart Announces Extension of Black Friday
In an announcement drowned out by gunfire and screams from rabid shoppers, we learn that Black Week is the extension of the savings so popular with consumers.
Dick Cousin Refuses to Pass Gravy on Thanksgiving
Preliminary reports for Thanksgiving indicate that dick cousin Andrew McDonald refused to pass anyone the gravy boat.
George Zimmerman Currently On Front Lawn Digging Massive Hole
George Zimmerman, arrested once again, is out on his front lawn digging a very large hole and does not show any signs of stopping.
Tea Party Congressman Trey Radel Becomes Bored with Tea, Opts for Cocaine
The Tea Party contemplates a name change after congressmember Trey Radel’s recent charge of cocaine possession.
Chris Farley Found Alive and Well in Toronto
It seems that Chris Farley is alive, and has been secretly running Toronto as his alter-ego, Rob Ford.
Storm Leads to Tornadoes, Death, and Fallen Leaves Right Where Local Man Raked
On Sunday, a fast-moving storm lead to the development of a delay in the Chicago Bears game, fallen leaves, as well as a few tornadoes and human casualties.
Public Shocked by Lewd Photos of Anthony Weiner in Congress
Anthony Weiner finds himself in the midst of yet another career-threatening scandal, this time with the United States Congress.
Special Agent Found Tied Up in Rucksack, Weighted Down with Cinder Blocks, and Locked Up With Chains’ Death Likely “Accidental”
After a full investigation, City of London Chief Inspector David Hammond has ruled the death of MI6 agent Richard Moore a “very unfortunate accident.”
Cards Against Humanity Releases Holiday Bullsh*t
The good people of Cards Against Humanity have released a treat for only the bravest derelicts. It’s called “12 Days of Bullshit” where, for $12, they will send you 12 gifts over 12 days starting in early December.
